everyMarch

Hi all, 

Thanks again for sticking with me even though there hasn't been a lot of activity on my profile. The funny thing, I used to blame this on my blog which I was spending a lot of time on. But now that blog is defunct. So now whose fault is it? I don't know, that guy? Probably. 

Anyway, let's not worry about that guy. He has his own issues. 

I'm currently struggling to get back on my feet after a few anxiety attacks that have set me back mentally and physically, so I spend a lot of time trying to regulate my health and to keep my head above water. 

That being said, art is a wonderful therapy. And there are many things I want to do. For instance, I'd love to start a music podcast. I want to finish my novel The Multiverse Chronicles: Part 1. I want to finish my web design training. 

But for now, I realize what I need to do. Back in the times of 2006-2010, I used to write poetry. I would take something I was upset about it, and turn it into something pretty that I could be proud of. The act of taking all of my complicated and confusing feelings and turning them into a short, easy to digest poem, was great therapy for me. So I decided to continue doing it. 

Over the last 15 years of my life, I've had many friendships that have ended. Some of those friends were toxic. Some were wonderful. Sometimes it was my fault. Other times the person was a psycho. Sometimes I didn't even know what happened or what I did to cause the rift. Sometimes it was an ex-boyfriend who had to cut me off to move on, and I wasn't ready to lose him from my life.

So I'm creating a book of poetry called The Trail of Broken Branches, which will have 8 different poems, each related to a friend I've lost, for better or for worse. I've posted Part 1 already, about one of my most painful losses. 

Romance is an interesting, confusing, strange, beautiful, cute and painful thing to write about. For that reason, it gets the most attention. Friendships can be just as complex and heartbreaking, and they deserve some attention, too!

(NOTE: if you are still Deviant-watching me, thanks so much for your loyalty! I owe you one loyalty hug! The reason I haven't posted much is because I've been working very hard on my new blog: Front Street Movie Revews, the link is: pertobello.com. Please check it out if you have been loyal because you like stuff I do. More stuff that I do is on this website. Thanks again, I'll post some new pics soon. I promise that this is not an empty promise...because I'm going to Algonquin in 2 days, so I'd be a sucker not to take pics! Thanks again for your support)

Addictions:

There all kinds of them, alcohol addictions, sugar addictions, gambling addictions, computer game addictions, work addictions, shopping addictions, fancy car addictions, caffeine addictions, Korean drama addictions, chocolate addictions, nicotine addictions, medication addictions, friendship addictions (commonly leading to stalking addictions), addictive TV show addictions, tea addictions, crumpet addictions, and come to think of it, listening to British people addictions.

Honestly, I didn't even know there were that many addictions until I wrote that paragraph.

Why are there so many addictions?
Where did they all come from?
Can we send them back to Tatooine?
The answers to the following questions are as follows:

1 - People like to take advantage of the imperfection of humans and our many wants (...that slowly turn into needs as we get accustomed to having those wants in our lives).

2 - Tatooine

3 - For now, we have not yet developed the technology to launch concepts into space (let alone getting them to congregate and line up and agree to be expelled from Earth).

But it's interesting you should bring up outer space.

Because there was an episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation, that aired in 1988, called "Symbiosis", and to quote the internet, in this episode...:

"The Enterprise encounters two neighboring cultures, one suffering from a plague, the other marketing a cure, and learn that nothing is as simple as it seems."

So we have two planets, one is the seller of medication, and the other is the buyer. At first, the crew and of course the audience are rooting for the sick planet to just get its medication so it can feel better! (There is a delay in getting the latest shipment).

Then wait a minute, when Dr. Crusher finally administers the drugs to the two guys (T'Jon & Romas) from the sick planet, she realizes that there is something fishy in the Alpha Quadrant! These guys aren't sick! They're suffering from withdrawal and they are just really, really, disablingly addicted to the meds. Their disease was cured years ago, but the seller planet still depends on the meds' addictive nature to make all their money and to keep their whole economy running.


At first when I saw this episode, I was thinking, "Pfft, all you need is for one hippy, or anarchist, or humanitarian, or any kind of person who has a conscious and doesn't mind ruining a whole planet's economy, to let the cat out of the bag."

But then I realized, you know, this is the first season of TNG, which also features mini non-organic life forms calling Picard an "ugly bag of meat," then the crew dimmed the lights and they reacted like the witch from Wizard of Oz.

So, you gotta know what you're dealing with. First season of TNG: Not All the Bugs are Worked Out.

Bugs aside, I realized that this episode is a great allegory for our lives today. Instead of two planets though, you just have humans. Buyers and Sellers.

Me? I'm a buyer. I find myself periodically addicted to caffeine, sugar, pina coladas, bread and french fries.

Caffeine is the number one habit I'd like to kick. Especially because when I start to feel down or dreary, I should probably reach for some vegetables and fruits, which contain nutrients that will actually make me feel better, not just make me THINK I feel better.

And that's the problem with addictions, they make you think you feel better, but you really don't. Because once the excitement, high or energy wears off, you're back where you started.

How do you free yourself then?

Well, let's ask Captain Picard.



Through most of the episode, as I remember it, Picard is lecturing everyone about not getting involved, and how it's not the Federation way to interfere in planetary affairs.

And just when you think that these poor drug addicts are going to be stuck buying meds they don't need, Picard says to T'Jon & Ramos, "whoops, I'm not helping you fix your cargo ship, and now you can't get supplies. Sorry, it's um, Starfleet protocol or something. Oh snap!" And the poor addicts are all, "AHH!! HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO US? WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!"

What are the lessons here?

Both races will now have an opportunity to advance and broaden out their economy/talents/uses of resources
Cold turkey
No pain, no gain
The more you suffer, the more it shows you really care
You can't send all addictions into space, but you can make your own personal rocket for your own addictions that you may be struggling with
And finally...

6. You are not going to die without the thing you are addicted to. You'll just FEEL like you're dying. It's totally different.



All the best to you! Me? I'm gonna cut back on the espresso.

I find I have difficulty fitting in sometimes. My family has always been a movie critic. Like one big movie critic. And I just want to say right now, I don't hate movies! I loves them! Lotsa love and hugs for movies!

It's because I love them that I discipline them so harshly.

Just as the new Tron Legacy film was drawing to a close, I turned to my friend Vito and opened my mouth to say, "ok, what was the deal with that plot? And those lines! And the development, yeesh!" but before I had a chance to say it, Vito said, "Wow, well I think that BLEW the first one out of the water!!" He was using a sort of half-sarcasm, because his attitude was, "as if I even have to say that".

I could argue that.

I had a party to watch the first Tron movie a week before the new one came out. Afterward people still wanted more movie so we looked thru a guy's movie collection and found The One, with Jet Li. I hadn't seen it yet, but I figured, hey, it's not gory and you don't have to think, throw it in!

It was this Tron/One night that helped me to figure out exactly what it is I want in an action movie. I don't want stupid attempts at emotional scenes. I don't want half-baked feelings. I don't want semi-developed characters and for everything that's not action to be lame bone thrown out there to "complete" the film. The only thing that completes is my severe irritation toward these types of movies.

I still preferred the original Tron to the new one because there was no attempt at developing the characters or the plot. It was an action movie and that was that. The One was the same way. Later that night, my best friend CR said to me in private, "who's idea was it to watch The One so I can CLOBBER THEM?!" and I said, "erm, me!" and she said "WHAT were you thinking? They didn't develop ANYTHING!"

And it clicked. They didn't develop anything. And I LIKED it. Here I was watching a film that briefly took place in 200+ alternate universes, and a guy was just going to each one killing himself so he could become stronger, and "universe police" were chasing him. It was a simple cops & robbers story, amid something that could have been a pretty deep premis like the Matrix. But the Matrix was about the Matrix. The One was about the One. The movie wasn't called "200+ Universes."

Tron Legacy threw us emotional peeps a tiny bone. Here you go, some feelings for the saps! But they only made it halfway there! Ok it was touching when he saw his father again, but what about ***SPOILER!!!!!!!!!!!*** when he left him again? Where was the emotion then? Losing a family member that you were finally just starting to get to know again after 20 years is painful, no matter how hot the chick you're with is!

What about when Kevin said, "I'd trade it all for one more day with you, son." ? That line sure irked me, because what is he trading? He's not King of mainframe, or the army, or the grid or anything. He just hides out all day. Unless he means he would trade his wicked collection of books and this sexy, sexy lady who's been keeping him company but now has turned her eyes to cutie patootie Sam Flynn. That's right, I said patootie.

They made a couple more attempts to tug at my heart strings with the the species that Kevin discovered then witnessed their destruction, and with the tiny cameos of Tron himself. But the focus was undecided on family issues vs action, I was frustration...in a jar...eating popcorn.

Not every film can tackle both sides like the Matrix, Batman Begins, the new Star Trek and quite honestly Toy Story 3 which was action packed and made me blubber like a snotty fountain, and I certainly would not expect that from every one. It's nice when they can do it, but if a movie doesn't want to it, or doesn't have the writing budget, then don't bother. If you're a Tiger, don't wear spots

Action movie writers who are reading this, who I'm guessing are many and are concerned and looking for tips for next time, I don't mind a 2 hour action sequence. Be free! Don't be bogged down with the things you're not good at. Focus on what you CAN do.

Lotsa love,
Cindy


PS/Disclaimer: In the interests of positivity and *sniffles...feelings of being alone....* I usually just say I really liked Tron Legacy, even with all the flaws! The action sequences were wicked-sweet and I won't just be ignorin' that. The light cycles scene took my breath away, so it wasn't all bad. Oh my GOSH and Daft Punk did a Fantastic job! I am a huge fan of them tho...Anyway, you deviants are my outlet for criticism. Thanks


Plot - No
Music - Yes
Characters - Yes
Development - No
Graphics - Yes

3/5

I seen it, you guys! I seen Inception! OH MY GOSH, you guys!

I have more to say on Inception than that, but as one of those adorable pixar shorts before I get into the main body, I HAVE TO RANT ABOUT SOMETHING!

Iced coffees from Tim Horton's. Are nothing like ice capps.

Here is the difference, you guys:

Ice capps come in many varieties; you can have them made with cream, chocolate milk or milk of any percentage of your choosing. You can get a mint or caramel shots in them. You can get whipped cream if you so please!

But one fundamental truth remains: If you order an ice capp, without specifying anything, you will get the same thing every time. There is a default ice capp.

Now with iced coffees, there are many options too, but it's a little less clear what a regular iced coffee is supposed to be, and that confuses the customers and the employees.

For a long time  I'd be like, "I'll have a vanilla ice coffee please?" And the employee would look at me like I was a crazy pirate with paisley pants and say, "you want a vanilla shot??" and I'd shuffle uncertainly and say, "yeah, sure!"

They always came out a little too sweet and the flavoring tasted too artifical for me.

One day I'm like, "vanilla iced coffee" and they're like "the shot or the vanilla base?" "Umm..the-the shot?"

Finally after going thru this a few times I realize I'm getting DOUBLE the vanilla flavor! Because they also add this gooey vanilla sugar to it, to replace the sugar you'd normally put in coffee but it actually dissolves. Then they were adding my vanilla shot on top of THAT! Bleh!

So after realizing this, I think my too-sweet iced coffee problems are going to be a thing of the past. I confidently declare at my next Tim's run, "I'LL HAVE AN ICED COFFEE WITH JUST THE VANILLA BASE PLEASE"

This is the response I get:

"You don't want any cream in it??"

Huh? Cream? No, I want cream. Right? When they say cream do they mean something they add extra or just like, cream that you normally put in coffee?

"Umm..um...no I think I want cream. Wait, what?"

Ok so, when they did put cream in it I realized ok, vanilla shot NO, vanilla bases YES, cream YES. I got this.

Next day:

"Can I have a ice coffee with the vanilla flavor, not the shot but just the base, and make sure there's cream in it?"

I receive my iced coffee with no vanilla base (which btw tastes awful. Tim Hortons coffee NEEDS help. It can't fly solo). But with the vanilla shot, (eww, fakeness), but with cream. I try it. Bleh. Sorry I have to ask them to remake it. I can't stay silent.

"Sorry I meant the other way around! I know it's confusing..." I confess.

She says, "Oh I see. Ok well...if you want it like that then, you can just say Iced Coffee. That's how we normally make it"

Oh my goodness!! I was soooooo happy to hear that! Finally something I can rely on! I'm getting old, you know. I don't have the time for these mind games!

I thanked her very much and pranced away with my delicious iced coffee.

This morning I decide to try out my new order, "a medium iced coffee please!!" I say, unable to contain my excitement.

Wait for it. Waiiiiit for it.

She says, "Ok, how do you like it?"



DDAAAAAAAAHHHHH!

I am too worked up to talk about Inception. Hmmph.

I saw the movie Salt the other day. One word:

Whoops that wasn't a word, was it? How about one comic: xkcd.com/311/: <---this is pretty much Salt excepting that it's Angelina Jolie. Beating up everyone. The sad thing is that it actually isn't that bad of a movie, and I'm NOT an action person. (I don't care what scene-it quizzes say I am!!**)There just may have been some slightly ludicrous things like Angelina hiding in an office while some guys with guns are pounding on the door, and she makes a pipe bomb out of a table leg and office supplies.

Most reviewers said the movie was lame. But Roger Ebert thot it was the best thing since high heaven. (High heaven being one of the most popular and talked about inventions since sliced bread!)

Here is what I don't get. Ebert had this to say about Salt:

""Salt" is a damn fine thriller. It does all the things I can't stand in bad movies, and does them in a good one. It's like a rebuke to all the lousy action movie directors who've been banging pots and pans together in our skulls. It winds your clock tight and the alarm doesn't go off for 100 minutes."

Then he goes on to talk about how gorgeous Jolie is for like 6 paragraphs.

Granted, but.

I saw a movie not long ago called Knight & Day, which was pure action from beginning to end, but unlike Salt, you loved the characters, there was a laugh a minute, it was tongue-in-cheek enough to accept any ridiculous action plots. Salt was dead serious. Salt really wanted you to believe that this stuff is actually happening for realz.

This is what Ebert had to say about Knight & Day:

"Have summer audiences been so hammered down by special effects that they require noise and fragmented visuals to hold their interest? Is it still possible to delight in a story unfolding with charm and wit?"

...Huh?!

Maybe I'm just annoyed because I want his job.

Maybe I do kinda like what he says after that: "How many machine guns do you need in a romantic comedy?" Hahahahahaha!!

It's not just Ebert. I too am a complicated person.

Anyway, I am going to briefly change the subject. My camera is broked. I was too hard on it. I was taking pics of pouring rain from my balcony and altho there was a roof over us, the moisture got into my camera and it hasn't worked since. Ember took it apart for me and left it out to see if that would dry it up, but sadly I hadn't discovered soon enuff that there was a problem. Basically the diagnosis came too late, and there was no saving my baby   =[

So I guess...

I'M GETTING A NEW CAMERA!! Possibly this one: www.dpreview.com/reviews/sonyd… I would like to acquire it in about two weeks but I'm going to shop around a bit. I'll be uploading one more batch of pics I took last month with my old camera. Those will be the "In memory of..." pics or whatever.

In loving memory of Cindy's camera. Or whatever.

Ok kids!! I gotta go but I'm probably gonna upload my pics now. So I'll still be here.

Thanks for being there for me when I need you most


Love,
Cindy

PS: There are in fact, no tips or tricks in this entry. Sorry.

**Joel got me to take this quiz online once and my test results were as follows: "You are an action junkie. You can't sit thru anything that doesn't have explosions or car chases. You feel that most problems do not need to be solved with words." ....Maybe I was choosing the lesser of 4 evils?? Did you think about THAT, quiz? Grrr!